myJaxonIf we don’t go crazy once in a while, we’ll all go crazy. - Hawkeye

Yeah, I’m back to doing a lot of reading if you haven’t noticed by the dozen or so reviews that have been posted. What can I say? It’s easy to read while Ian’s nursing. Ian is starting to take naps in his crib, which means I don’t have to read as much. Thank god. I’ve ran out of books that I want to read and am trying to find new authors/books/series to read. Adrian is helping me out a lot. It’s nice having someone else who’s addicted to the same type of book I am. She helps feed my addiction.

Anyway, it just seemed like I’ve been posting a lot of reviews lately and thought I should post something else. There isn’t really anything going on at the moment. We were suppose to go see some fireworks last night, but Jesse was exhausted so of course we didn’t go. I was looking forward to seeing the fireworks last night, but hey, it’s not the fourth yet. I’m going to try and find some others that may be in the area. Ian and I are making weekly trips to the library in a bid to get us out of the apartment and I may be going to see PJ and lil’ Chris next week. It depends on her schedule. PJ is already going back to work after only about 5 weeks with Chris. Granted, it’s only 3 hours a day, a couple of days a week, but it’s something that is getting her out of the house. It’s not like I could do anything like that. Jesse can’t handle staying home with Ian for more than an hour at a time, so it doesn’t leave me with many options. I can’t wait until the Ren Fest though in August. That is going to be a lot of fun. Plus there is the Jackson Balloon Rally in a couple of weeks. We’re going to go show Ian his first hot air balloons. It should be amusing. I’m not getting out as much as I used to, but I’m dealing with what I can. I know the site is boring at the moment, but hey, when the only social interaction you have is with a four month old, there really isn’t a lot you can do. Okay, I’m starting to get depressed. I am going to find out what I have to do to get a chicken pox vaccination. I’ve never had them so I need to get vaccinated before my lil’ one gives them to me (although, he is getting the vaccine as well).

It just dawned on me why I’m not motivated at the moment. I’m bored. Not the whole “I have nothing to do, so I’m bored” mentality, but the fact that my life is boring and dull. I know I need to lose the weight. Hell, I’ve gained 50lbs since going to college in 1998, and I really want to get down to where I was, but I’m not motivated. Afterall, in order to be motivated, there has to be some kind of outcome at the end, right? What do I have to look forward to? Staying home with Ian and having really no social interaction at all. That is sure going to motivate me. Let me tell ya. I don’t make friends easily. I’m sure there are those of you who say I’m nuts for saying that; but seriously think about that. The majority of my friends are my friends because they knew Jesse and that was how I met them. I mean, there is PJ and Joslyn and……..that’s it. Really. Those are the only two friends I have that didn’t rely on knowing Jesse first. And it’s not like I can really remedy that situation at the moment. Where would I go? What would I do? With Jesse being the only one working, we really can’t afford to do anything. Hell, joining an aerobic class would give me the chance to meet people, but we can’t because we need to conserve our resources. And it’s not like I’m familiar with the area to find something that is free.  Ian and I have been doing a lot with the library, but there is only so much we can do at the moment since it’s summer.  So that’s why I haven’t been motivated lately. I have no reason to be.